January 2012
Rejected, but never stopped.
AMANDA AND I JUST PLANNED OUT WEEKEND IN THE CITY
And now off to bed dream about the concrete jungle.
WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER WHEN YOU ARE IN A BAD MOOD?
Music, hot tea, and writing it all out.
It's gone now. It's gone, gone, gone with the wind.
Charlotte Hay is now in the Archives.
Thank you to everyone who…
- Had my back.
- Made me cry.
- Made me look like a 50 year old woman.
- Kept me sane.
- Made sure I was ready for the best and the worst.
- Bought me food, tea, and cough drops.
- Held me tight and refused to let go.
- Made me smile.
- Kissed me fiercely.
Now, countdown until the concrete jungle: 5 days.
I am so proud of myself.
For the first time in awhile.
I don’t care what anyone said or says, I did my best.
MY MOM BOUGHT MY PLANE TICKET FOR UNIFIEDS!
One more week and I’m coming home, New York City.
This time, for a chance.
Claiming the stage
I must remember that I am doing this for myself and no one else.
My happiness is based off how much energy I will bring to the table.
I am ready.
After these last two painful months of finding out who Charlotte really is, I’m ready to make a house of people laugh hysterically.
I know this will be my first and last lead, but I am going to take full advantage of that stage, my audiences, and my emotions.
It’s time to show what being infinite is all about.
Support...
The only thing I need to get by from this point until Saturday night.
Regina Spektor is the solution to my problems.
you have a lead? rock on! dont worry about representing your school and everything, just focus that you're an artist, on stage, your home! we thespians live for the stage and belong on the stage and no matter what happens or screws up during a show it should still be the best time ever! break a leg!
Oh my goodness! This makes me so happy! Thank you so much! Please tell all your Anon BFFLZ to come see Moon Over Buffalo at DPHS this Friday and Saturday at 7pm!
“From being in love to hypnosis is evidently only a short step. The respects in which the two agree are obvious. There is the same humble subjection, the same compliance, the same absence of criticism, towards the hypnotist just as towards the loved object. There is the same absorption of one’s own initiative; no one can doubt that the hypnotist has stepped into the place of the ego ideal. It is only that everything is even clearer and more intense in hypnosis, so that it would be more to the point to explain being in love by means of hypnosis than the other way round.”
—Sigmund Freud
I’m so nervous.
I perform my first lead ever.
I get so manic and dazed at everything that happens with this show.
I am up at 4 in the morning because my thoughts and emotions get the best of my sleep patterns.
I am representing everything with this show:
My school.
My ensemble.
My family.
My future.
I need motivation and happiness…quick.
I know I have to find it myself, but I need someone by my side to help me find it.
To Do Lists and Anything Goes
The only things that are keeping me sane, yet up.
I have the biggest week ahead of myself.
I will spill my guts more later.
I got accepted into Point Park University!
My first college, what a nice start!
Reasons to smile before beddy by.
An A on my journal. An A on my monologues and songs. An A on my Senior Research paper. A wonderful day of rehearsal. PB&J for dinner. The possibility of going to Disney after dress on Sunday. A cute boy texting me before I fall asleep. Half of senior year is gone. New York in two weeks, Buffalo in one, Beast in five.